The longer I go without blogging, the more I avoid it. Today I decided that I don't need to worry about catching people up to date, and just write what I need to write to process whatever is happening in my life. So I'll tell you that the past few months have been our hardest, physically, emotionally, and financially and leave it at that.

Its 3 weeks into summer. Tyler had barely been home, already having attended two different football camps and begun practice for the freshman team. Right now he is in CA with a friend doing all the fun, touristy stuff in the Bay Area. I'm surprised that I am missing the revolving door of teenage boys.

Madison went to Girls Camp and had a great time, and also spent a few days camping with her grandparents. Just like I did at her age, Maddie prefers to use her summer break devouring novels and catching up on TV shows.

Jacob started off his summer by having the worst meltdown of the year on the last day of school, including punching several of the classroom aides and peeing on a wall. These three weeks since then have been filled with aggression and emotion and some of the most intense interactions to date.

Not awesome.

Today he has cried for the majority of the day, real tears running down his cheeks, which kills both Chris and I because we desperately wish to be able to understand why he is so upset. He tried over and over to explain to us what he wants/needs/feels but we just don't get it. Then the sadness turns to anger, which escalates much too quickly, and this cycle has continued all day.

Thats all I got.